Safety During a Explosive Incident
If an argument seems unavoidable, try to have it in a room or area that has access to an exit. Avoid the bathroom, kitchen, or anywhere near weapons.
Practice how to get out of your home safely. Identify which doors, windows, elevators, or stairs, would be safe and easily accessible.
Have a packed bag ready. Keep it in a secret but accessible place in order to leave quickly.
Identify a neighbor you can tell about the violence and ask that they call the police if they hear a disturbance coming from your home.
Make up a code word to use with your children, family, friends, and neighbors when you need the police.
Decide a plan for where you will go if you have to leave home ( even if you don’t think you will need to).
If the situation is very dangerous, use your own instinct and judgment to keep yourself safe. Call the police as soon as it is safe to do so. You can obtain a protection order.
YOU HAVE THE RIGHT NOT TO BE ABUSED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP, EITHER PHYSICALLY, EMOTIONALLY OR SEXUALLY!
Safety When Preparing to Leave
Identify who would let you stay with them or lend you some money.
Always try to take your children with you or make arrangements to leave them with someone you trust.
Leave money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents, and extra clothes with someone you trust.
Open a savings account in your name to start to establish your independence. Think of other ways in which you can increase your indepenence.
Keep the shelter numbers close at hand and keep change or a calling card with you at all times.
Review your safety plan with a friend or counselor in order to plan the safest way to leave your abusive partner.
THE MOST DANGEROUS TIME IS WHEN YOU LEAVE
Safety in Your Home
Inform neighbors and landlord that your partner no longer lives with you and that they should call the police if they see your abuser near your home.
Rehearse a safety plan with your children for when you are and are not with them.
Inform your children’s school or day care about who has permission to pick up your children. (give them a copy of you protection order.)
Change/add locks on your doors and windows as soon as possible. Add a peephole and increase outdoor lighting if possible. Try to borrow a portable or cell phone.
Change your telephone number, and make sure it is unlisted. Don’t give it to anyone you don’t trust.
Safety with a Protection Order
Keep your protection order with you at all times
Call the Police if your partner breaks the court order.
Think of alternative ways to keep safe if the police do not respond right away.
Inform family, friends and neighbors that you have a protection order in effect.
Try to avoid places in the community your batterer might frequent.
Your Safety And Emotional Health
If you are thinking of returning to a potentially abusive situation, discuss an alternative plan with someone you trust.
If you have to communicate with your partner, determine the safest way to do so.
Have positive thoughts about yourself and be assertive to others about your needs.
Plan to attend a support group to gain support from others and learn about the law and your rights.
Decide who you can call freely and openly to give you the support you need.
Read books, articles and poetry to help you feel stronger.
Collect resources and pamphlets concerning Woman Abuse.
Safety on The Job And In Public
Decide who at work you will inform of your situation. This should include office and building security. (provide a picture of your abuser if possible).
Arrange to have someone screen your telephone calls if possible
Identify a safety plan for when you leave work. Have someone escort you to your car, bus or train. Use a variety of routes to go home if possible. Think about what you would do if something happened while going home.
If You Are a Teen In a Violent Relationship
If things in you relationship don’t feel right to you talk about it to someone you trust..
Decide which friend, teacher, or relative you can go to in a emergency.
In Flin Flon, the Women’s Resource Centre has a Youth Counsellor for individual or group counselling. She also goes into the local schools on a regular basis. Call 681-3105 for more information or ask your school guidance counsellor if our Youth Counsellor is available at the school.
Contact us at 681-3105 to learn how to obtain a protection order and make a safety plan.